March 2, 2020
Could I Fail Jesus?
After he had said this, Jesus was troubled in spirit and testified,
“Very truly I tell you, one of you is going to betray me.” His disciples stared at one another, at a loss to know which of them he meant. One of them, the disciple whom Jesus loved, was reclining next to him. Simon Peter motioned to this disciple and said, “Ask him which one he means.” Leaning back against Jesus, he asked him, “Lord, who is it?” (John 13:21-25).
We as believers in Christ try our best to follow the path that God has laid out for us, but sometimes we tend to wander away from it. It might be that we become stuck in our own ways and only rely on ourselves. It could also be a hardship in our life that we don’t understand or don’t know how to handle, or it may just be a falling out with God that is unexplainable. We tend to question God. It’s human nature.
However, we are called to have faith and trust that God loves us and has great things planned for us. I often get distracted by life and forget about God. I try to keep him in my heart and mind, but sometimes my everyday life takes up so much of my time and thoughts that I can’t seem to find time for Jesus. When I get to that point, I feel like I’m betraying Jesus, like I’m taking his sacrifice to save me for granted. I feel like I’m pushing God away and saying: “I don’t need you, God. I can handle everything on my own. Just leave me alone, I’ve got this.” (Even when I know in my heart that this is not true.)
When I become overwhelmed, I push everyone away, even Christ who loves me unconditionally. He loves me so much I can’t even begin to imagine it and it hurts me to know that I push so much love away. But I know that Jesus loves me even when I fail him, and I know I will always find my way back to Christ.
Peter failed Jesus on Good Friday, but the love he showed for Jesus when he saw him again was stronger than ever before. Even if we do fail Jesus, he will always let us back into his heart. God knows our hearts and knows what is right for us. There will be times in life when we stray from the Lord’s path, but we must all remember it is never too late to find our way back. Sometimes life gets in the way and we try to face it alone, even when we know deep down that we can’t. I know that God always seeks our hearts when we leave his path, but it is up to us to respond to his call to return. We must repent from our wandering, from our pride and from gaining self-worth in worldly achievements. God has so much more planned for us. All we have to do is welcome him into our hearts and have faith.